a bible verse that troubles me, deeply

Matthew 1: 24-25
‘When Joseph woke up, he did what the angel of The Lord had commanded him and he took Mary home as his wife. but he had no union with her until she gave birth to a son. And he gave him the name Jesus.’

Joseph listens; no words of his are ever recorded in the Bible; he is a builder; a worker; a man who uses his hands with his heart. He listens to the hearts of others; his heart and the Angel’s heart as the Angel speaks God’s will into Joseph’s life. And Joseph follows god’s will to my troubling place: ‘he had no union’
No union? With a beautiful young Virgin (to Joseph Mary had to be beautiful; he desired her to be his wife, a co-family builder) and he doesn’t touch her, and did not move to a union till after their child’s birth?
My trouble:
I could not do this. I marvel that the scripture states he did; I question how can this be true? I could not.

I question, troubled about him and me. Speak Joseph, speak by the spirit into my heart. I want to hear you.